Having played poker for over 20 years and worked in the industry now for over four, I’ve seen some things, man!
As a live reporter fortunate enough to travel the globe for a profession, I know there are ways things are done inside poker rooms in different parts of the world. The European overhand slide pitch, round-for-round play on a tournament bubble instead of hand-for-hand, counterclockwise action in cash games, no redraw at the final three tables, or the brand new ‘Savage Average’ tournaments.
Basically, there’s stuff and things you’re going to see in different parts of the world, and I’ve seen a lot of unique formats and rulings in my travels over the years. But something I experienced recently in a London cash session was a completely new one that got me thinking that this was something worthy of a bit of discussion and this article.
Ah, beautiful and historic London, England
We’re not going to mention the specific casino, but in addition to poker the venue offers plenty of real money casino games, and those who’ve played here may recognize its traits and sleuth out its location.
I sat in a £1/£2 game (which is basically the equivalent of a $10/$20 CAD game (okay, maybe not that much, but that exchange rate, yikes! Big thanks to my employers for covering my food expenses while working in England!)
The seat I was assigned in this very busy and cramped room was the 1 seat, against a wall where the 2/3 and 6/7 seats at this 8-handed table were smushed back-to-back with players at the adjacent tables. Those players actually had to stand up from their seats to push them in to allow for any players doomed to the 1 or 8 seats to access their playing location.
My initial thought of ‘boy I hope I don’t have to use the bathroom while I’m trapped back here’, was immediately followed by, “Dealer, can I please have a seat change button” which fortunately was accommodated. Even more fortunate was being able to use that seat change button within about a half hour or so as a player in the 4 seat left, allowing me to move into that spot.
READ MORE: Top 10 Reasons for Cash Game Players to Request a Seat Change
At the same time, players in the 5 and 7 seats picked up as well, and that’s when things got interesting.
With my move to the 4 seat, seats 5,7, and that awful virtual cage of a 1 seat were all open as the dealer called for players to fill the seats. A young man approached the table with those seats as his options. For some momentarily baffling reason, he chose to wedge his way past myself and the player in the 2 seat who stood, up, shoved in his chair, and allowed this new player to take his spot in arguably the worst seat in the entire room.
His reason for doing so though quickly became very apparent.
Hello, Poker Noob!
The next hand was dealt and as action came to our new player in the 1 seat, he checked, preflop. The dealer gave him a peculiar look and told him to bet or fold, to which he replied, “how much?”
Yup, the 1 seat was brand-spanking new to playing poker.
After being told “two to call or you can raise or fold” by the player in the 2 seat (not the dealer) the player limped in for two then checked his cards again in a manner apparent that holding physical cards in in his hands was something brand new to him.
Now, while the rest of the table salivated at the prospects of business picking up at what had been a pretty uneventful table to this point, my equal excitement for picking off the funds of our inexperienced new friend (come on, don’t pretend that you don’t see $$$ signs — or £££ signs, as it were — flashing in your head when this happens), soon turned more to concern for the rookie.
On this night, I’d have been better seeing a concert at Royal Albert Hall
Remember how he had chosen to take that incredibly uncomfortable seat at the table to start instead of one of the two far more comfortable options available? Well, it was because he was hoping for some help from the dealer in his obviously maiden journey to a casino poker table.
And he wasn’t getting that help.
The dealer, who was well experienced in his profession, unfortunately didn’t show any interest in helping this player. He proceeded to pitch cards, take bets, gather pots, and spread boards without any concern for the 1 seat.
Action would come to him and repeatedly he would act hesitantly, ask what he could bet, ask what his options were, and act in a manner that repeatedly echoed his inexperience. He would look to the dealer for help, but aside from standard commands that he didn’t fully understand such as “check or bet”, or a mention of what the previous bet on a street was, he was lost and confused until either the player in the 2 seat or myself would explain to him more precisely what his options were.
After a couple of orbits of this, I decided that something needed to be said to a floorman about this dealer.
Action’s on… Me?
I left the table and walked across the room to a floorman out of sight of the table to explain the situation. I discretely suggested that, once the dealer’s down was completed, he ought to be spoken to about his demeanor and that whoever the next dealer to occupy the box at this table should be alerted to the rookie player’s needs.
I requested these things with the idea of not making it apparent to the dealer, player, and the rest of the table, so as not to embarrass the player, call out the dealer, and I’ll admit, not make it obvious that I was the one who had said something. My thought was that after a few more hands, the new dealer would come in knowing what to expect, help the player, and keep things happy at our table (yes, while we still salivated over the prospect of the dead money).
Something very different happened though. The floorman suggested that he would go to the table immediately and “address the situation”.
Welp; so much for discretion.
My thoughts at that moment were that I didn’t want this addressed immediately because besides this obviously calling attention to the player, it would also call attention to the dealer that I had complained about him. It wasn’t as if he was going to spit on my cards before he pitched them to me, but if you’ve complained about any form of service and that person still has to serve you, it’s not exactly a comfortable situation.
My request went unheeded as the floorman insisted that he’d “address it immediately.” I decided that an extended trip to the restroom to ponder my options upon return to the table was the GTO move.
While away from the table for another 5-10 minutes, I thought that while I may be shot a sneer or two by the dealer during the time remaining in his down, it wouldn’t be that long before he moved on and ultimately, my goal of the rookie player hopefully being treated better both immediately and for the remainder of his session would be accomplished.
Boy did that totally not happen.
This session is about to go straight down the… Tube!
Floored by the Response
As I returned to the table, the floorman was there and at the tail end of a vague discussion with the dealer that resulted in quite a baffling and undesired result.
Turns out that the floorman’s “addressing of the situation” was to remove the player in the 1 seat from the table and move him to another table!
A player from an adjacent table was subsequently moved into our 1 seat with the dealer seemingly unaware of why this had happened. He began his next pitch shaking his head saying “I don’t know what just happened. I’ve never seen that,” suggesting that without any specific explanation to him, the rookie had been swapped out for the new player by the floorman.
Remember that table of players salivating at the prospect of dead money in the 1 seat? Well, it wasn’t the dealer that was shooting me evil looks, it was now the other seven players at the table. As I had feared… yeah, they knew what was up.
As I sat there uncomfortably debating whether to ask for a table change of my own or to just pick up and call it an early night as I was distracted by thoughts of the situation and the strange turn it had taken, I picked up a playable hand in middle position and raised. The rest of the table folded very quickly and I picked up the blinds. Hmm.
A couple of hands later at this now very quiet table as the discussion of the ruling had subsided, I raised again. The player to my left shot me a very deliberate glance and mucked his hand, still staring at me. The rest of the table quickly folded again.
I was shocked that such a deliberate, collective show of dissent against me was taking place. I seriously couldn’t believe that these players had silently decided that I would get no action while I was at the table. The hint was taken. I racked up immediately and said, “okay then, you guys have fun.”
Sadly, this was not a place I’d be going to on this night (either figuratively or literally)
Am… Am I the @$$hole???
I left the casino and headed into the Tube (London Underground) with thoughts of what had happened still running through my head. Why couldn’t the floorman have taken my suggestion of discretion to keep things collectively happy while still aiding the recreational player? How hard would that have been? Instead, what happened happened, and I was made the bad guy while trying to do the right thing.
Okay, let’s discuss.
So, besides the floorman’s decision to move the player, the other question is “should I have just kept my mouth shut and let this player lose his money while likely having an unpleasant time doing so?”
Oh, and one more thing: have you ever seen seven poker players form an angry mob so quickly as to effectively banish a player from the table?! I mean, we’re talking a £1/£2 game here! No one is changing their life by getting this dude’s money!
A couple of brief chats I’ve had with poker folks since the incident resulted in responses of head-shaking at the floor’s decision, a couple saying that “yeah, I should have just let things play out and felt no guilt about the player’s imminent financial demise,” and a solid “Da Fuq?!” at the table’s collective revolt against me.
It was indeed a solid ‘Da Fuq?!’ kind of moment all around.
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